From Close to-Loss of life to New Life: A Story of Love and Friendship

My fortieth birthday celebration didn’t begin the best way I hoped it to. It definitely didn’t finish nicely— until you actually like hospitals. However I nonetheless had a implausible time and ended feeling cherished and cared for like by no means earlier than.That is the story of how friendship is all the things.

Once we turned 18, my one-week-senior finest good friend and I organised a weekend tenting get together. Some 40 geeky youngsters walked for 15km from a prepare station to play video games, drink, and be foolish.

It was such a blast that we by no means stopped. In Polish, when a celebration is nice and also you wish to maintain partying, the following weekend you organise ‘Poprawiny’ — an ‘Amendment Party’.

We didn’t do one the next week, however we did subsequent 12 months. And yearly since (besides 2020, might or not it’s forgotten). If we stopped and began getting older usually, we’d each be 40 this 12 months. Thank gods for modification events.

And thus it has been 12 months after 12 months: Thursday to Sunday, mates, forest, meadow, lake, tents, vans, bonfire, making music, and simply lengthy summer season days of blissful nothing.

I quickly moved to Scotland, however each summer season I got here again to Poland to host it. I keep in mind the time when the primary little one appeared on the get together — he’s 14 now and he’s been there just about yearly of his life. In time, there have been extra households, canine, new companions… The get together grew to become a time-lapse of our lives, an annual snapshot of mates who stored altering but nonetheless wished to stay round. New folks seem, others transfer on, however a core group of about 20 who have been there from the beginning stays. Some I solely see this one time a 12 months, however after we do, it’s like no time has handed.

This 12 months was shaping up nice, with a larger-than-usual crowd and individuals who determined to return again after years of absence. It might have been our fortieth, in any case. Even when we’re celebrating a number of days after my finest good friend’s and some earlier than my precise birthdays. I couldn’t wait.

One of many first to reach was a lover of mine from Berlin. We went skinny dipping within the lake, we swam round having fun with the right summer season day and as we have been drying ourselves she mentioned: Simon, what is that this?

It was a hoop on my thigh. A purple ring surrounding the place the place a pair weeks again a tick bit me.

I had it examined a number of days earlier than, too. There was no ring then and the take a look at got here again destructive. Seems, antibody exams suck.

I’ve Lyme illness.

Don’t panic. My dad and mom’ good mates are docs. I known as them and shortly acquired an e-prescription for a course of Doxycycline. One other good friend was simply arriving by way of a close-by city and picked it up for me from the pharmacy. I might take the primary dose inside a pair hours.

He enquired after a listing of the issues I shouldn’t do whereas taking it. All of which have been precisely the issues I wished to do that weekend:

Keep within the solar
Drink alcohol
Have dairy merchandise

The final one was the worst. You see, there may be this superb Polish drink known as Maślanka — it’s type of like a buttermilk yoghurt however higher. It’s scrumptious. And I acquired two litres of the berry flavoured one I like probably the most…

Happily, my mates cherished it simply as a lot. I gave away all of the alcohol I introduced with me, too, and my beautiful mates went on a mission to seek out me the very best flavoured alcohol-free beers and shandies. It turned out fantastic.

The times continued, increasingly more mates arrived in a while Thursday, then on Friday, with some extra nonetheless turning up on Saturday, pitching their tents, having fantastic chats, going for walks… The jam session on Friday evening appeared to by no means wish to finish. We stored grooving for ages, getting right into a loopy trance, swapping devices, singing and vocalising, oscillating between songs and winding drones, starting from people by rock to ambient electro.

The kisiel combat on Saturday is at all times my spotlight however this 12 months it was simply the very best. Kisiel is that this sticky jelly-custard-like desert. It’s simply starch, fruit syrup and water, actually. I make about 100 litres of it, unfold it between three large bowls, after which we take it out to the meadow and have an enormous meals combat. Throwing, spreading, screaming, wrestling, licking… It’s superior.

The bonfire that evening was magical. The banter stored going and going, switching between Polish, German and English. {The teenager} who has been at these events since his perpetually was allowed to remain up till he drops, so he did. My lover an I stayed lengthy after, watching the falling stars and having probably the most wonderful intercourse by the hearth.

She had a job the following day, so I dropped her off to the prepare station at 5am. I slept in my van and after I opened the door round midday, the very first thing I noticed was a good friend struggling together with his personal van. Flat tire.

You don’t go away a van buddy in a bind. He didn’t have a jack, so I lent him mine. We acquired the previous tire off however after I rolled the brand new one in place, it turned out we have to carry the van a number of extra centimetres to make it match.

I crawled underneath to do that.

My jack wasn’t meant for this van. You shouldn’t must crawl underneath to make use of the jack.

It toppled.

The van slipped off the jack and fell on my shoulder, crushing me to the bottom.

The subsequent factor I keep in mind is strolling in some path and speaking to a good friend who didn’t perceive that I’m asking if somebody might take me to the hospital.

Then the ache set in.

I used to be almost fainting.

Someone acquired a automotive began, one other helped me in… I keep in mind making an attempt to elucidate that the route Google recommends is bumpy and may we take a unique highway.

On the finish of the 15km journey to the closest hospital, I used to be acutely aware sufficient to elucidate what occurred.

They mentioned they’ll must do some exams. My mates went again to convey my medical health insurance card. Different mates discovered and packed a few of my stuff. Some got here to verify in on me however they wouldn’t allow them to in. My mother had some premonition and known as. I used to be being wheeled round from x-ray to CT scan to blood exams to ward. No punctured lung. No inside bleeding. No hazard to life. Lie down and relaxation, watch for extra exams.

Associates stored messaging to ask what to convey me. One took cost of the get together clean-up — she’s a natural-born Domina, I can’t consider a greater particular person for the job. One other provided to drive my van again to Berlin. Someone introduced me some meals and a cellphone charger. One other particular person introduced the Doxycycline. And the blessed earplugs. I used to be in a room with two older guys who watched the Olympics all day lengthy. Sufficient sport to final me for the following 4 a long time.

I had method an excessive amount of time to consider what might have occurred. If the van had moved just a few centimetres decrease — if it had not rested on the brand new wheel however on the previous deflated one, or if it had fallen to the bottom… I might not be penning this now.

I’ve by no means been so near loss of life or so pleased to be alive.

Or so grateful for mates. It’s bizarre however regardless of the preliminary shock, none of this spoiled my temper within the slightest. The ache was horrible, I almost died, my plans fell by and I will likely be recovering for some time however… all I felt was love and care and gratitude.

I made a decision to write down them birthday playing cards. Them and different individuals who have been essential in my life, simply to inform them how grateful I’m that they’re part of my journey. I wrote a number of to folks I’ve harm, to say I’m sorry. I wrote these I misplaced contact with.

I despatched all of them out on my precise birthday.

My precise birthday was after I acquired out. My finest good friend, the one I host the get together with since we’re 18, picked me up together with his spouse and toddler son. We wished to spend a while collectively earlier than I needed to catch the prepare to Berlin, have a meal and a birthday cake, however the hospital misplaced a strip of my Doxycycline and the one physician who might prescribe me extra was nowhere to be discovered for over an hour.

Ultimately, we purchased an affordable low-dairy cake in a grocery store bakery and ate it on the village prepare station.

It was excellent.

I’m again in Berlin now, nonetheless unable to consider how insanely fortunate I’m. Solely inside bruises, sprains and a few gentle tissue tears. No fractures. No punctures. No blood clots. It can heal.

It not hurts after I breathe and I’m slowly even capable of carry the kettle. My Doxycycline course ends in every week and I’ve a strong probability it kills the Lyme illness.

However none of it issues as a result of the onslaught of kindness continues: a good friend did some looking for me and helped unpack my van yesterday; a lover stayed the evening and washed my hair; one other is coming over tonight and I’ve acquired two mates visiting on Friday. I would even make it to the marriage I’m invited to on Saturday.

‘Hell is Other People’, mentioned Jean Paul Sartre.

Possibly.

However should you select them proper, so is heaven.

—

This put up was beforehand revealed on Life Compass with Dr Simon Fokt.

***

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